Follow Through
I had the privilege of being a bridesmaid this past weekend at a precious school friend's wedding. As my 31 year old friend has had the incredible will power to save herself for marriage, for her kitchen tea, I asked that each person would write on a little index card a "Tip for the Bedroom". The tips could be as silly as "paint it blue" or as helpful as ladies were willing to be. It was fascinating knowing many of the marriages in the room and reading some of the advice to a new bride. One in particular caught my attention. It was written by another good school friend's mom. I spent many, many days (and nights) in this couples home growing up and their home has a loving, laughing, happy atmosphere. Their three daughters all blossomed into beautiful ladies. After about 35 years of marriage, her 'tip for the bedroom' was "Never, never, never, NEVER, NEVER, never, never, never say 'No'!" I think what was so inspiring about her advice, was that one could deduce from the long list of 'never's', that she meant for the advice to be not just heard but taken to heart and followed through on. (Which explains why her husband is always smiling...) To me, it speaks of so much more than sex. It means knowing how to love your husband or wife or kids, and not just knowing it but actually doing it. In parenting, most people know that they should be consistent with their discipline, that they should spend time with their kids, that they should lead by example... it's just the follow through, or lack of follow through, that makes the difference between averagely good parents and great parents. In marriage, most men know they should prioritise their families, that they should tell their wives they're beautiful, that they should play cricket with their boys and be home for dinner... Just as most wives know they shouldn't hold their bodies back from their husbands, that they should look attractive when he walks through the door, that they shouldn't nag and whine... But man, the follow through makes all the difference. Most of us don't even have will power over what we eat! We need to be a little more like athletes - able to beat ourselves into submission and choose our behaviour - instead of being tossed about by our whims and desires. Yes, we may be young moms in a physically demanding stage of our lives. Yes, we may be facing challenges and life may be a little overwhelming. But let's get ahold of ourselves! Let's get life into perspective. I mean, we can sleep when we're dead! I've already asked God if I could please have the first century just for sleeping, and then the rest of eternity to do whatever else there is to do in heaven. :) Life is short, and we're not just fighting for flat stomachs here. This is not just 'diet will power'. We're fighting for marriages, for our children to turn out right, for God's reputation in the world as people look at us Christians, for His kingdom to be established, for a war to be won. My marriage and my children will NOT be casualties, simply because I didn't have the strength to follow through on what I knew I needed to do. More than that - they will be assets and shining examples of what we can achieve with a little more determination and a little more commitment to saying 'yes' to the right things... So come on, do the right thing... You'll probably even enjoy it... ;)
