Stop Whining and Ask Nicely!
Whether it's to moan about being treated unfairly ("She hit me!") or just an ordinary request that is in a whining tone (I'm thirsteeee!") we want to teach our kids to stop whining and speak nicely.
First off, we need to remember that bringing up children is not done in a day or in one lesson. Even if you are doing it perfectly, there is no magic solution. Teaching children is an every day, every minute occurrence.
With that in mind, the second thing we need to remember is that children, particularly young children, are most often not trying to do things wrong. We do not always need to be shouting at them. Our job is to teach them, to train them, so that they know how to talk. This is true of their vocabulary and their sentence structure, and it is true of their tone of voice, too.
When your child asks for "juicy", we remind them that it's not called "juicy", it's called "juice". When they say, "Me want juice", we remind them that it's, "I want juice."
In the same way, when they whine "I want juuuuuice!", we remind them in a cherry voice that we would like to hear repeated, "Please may I have some juice, Mum?"
And then, most importantly, we only deliver the desired response that they are looking for (in this case the juice) once we have heard the request repeated in the correct way.
Children learn by process of cause and effect. They learn that when they whine, they don't get what they want. When they ask nicely, they do. Please do yourself a favour and read up on parenting with patience to see how and why to continue teaching them patiently when you have to repeat your lesson ten times a day for ten years!
Once you have decided that you want to be spoken to kindly and respectfully in your home, PLEASE remember - consistency is everything!! Do not tire of reminding them to "stop whining and ask Mommy/Daddy nicely."